Hies...its a long long time since I blogged.
Updates on my status: Prelims are in 5 days, A levels are in 2 months and for the first time im seriously looking at the possibility of not getting my straight A's
Its not that I'm arrogant, its just...well...I am an extreme perfectionist. My friends can vouch for that.
Aside from all that, my recent weeks have been drowned in a storm of negative thoughts and feelings which have been fluctuating pretty badly. Its not just the stress in studies, its now crept into every aspect of life. Many of my previous assumptions of myself have been challenged this year.
I guess its just God's way of reminding me how much more I still have to improve in order to really serve and obey Him.
One good thing about crisises, they almost always drive me closer to God. Which is what I must do now, focus on God, not the circumstances.
I tend to fall prey very easily to external circumstances...and my mood can be quite affected by them. And when my mood is affected, thats it. One of the most effective weapons Satan employs against me is always directed at my thought patterns. Once I hook on to a slightest negative thought, I am defenceless. Looking back, this has been a recurring trend in my spiritual walk with God.....one of the major things that keep me from walking closer with God.
The antidote? "In everything give thanks, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" 1 Thess 5:18
A very hard verse for me to obey, but with God's help I shall do it.
In the meanwhile, I just have to keep trusting God one step at a time. I guess this is real faith, because I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel, every step I take is shrouded in uncertainty. But the only thing that keeps me going is the knowledge that God will walk every dark step with me. Since He's there with me always, whats there to worry? whats there to fear?
Lord help me always, in all ways and times, give thanks.....create in me a clean, pure and joyful heart, so that I may serve You better than before......help me be contented with my circumstances in life, help me surrender my will to Yours, help me learn not to borrow from tomorrow's grace but daily walk with You......help me to ask for the lesson learnt, not the problem solved......help me humbly accept your plan for me.......help me love obey and serve thee out of agape, not self love..............strengthen me and enable me to serve Your purpose in my generation, as David did....help me love you even more. This is the extent to which my human, selfish, limited love can go.......tear out that self love and replace it with yours
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding......
Lord stay with me....every minute, every hour......I don't want to leave
Updates on my status: Prelims are in 5 days, A levels are in 2 months and for the first time im seriously looking at the possibility of not getting my straight A's
Its not that I'm arrogant, its just...well...I am an extreme perfectionist. My friends can vouch for that.
Aside from all that, my recent weeks have been drowned in a storm of negative thoughts and feelings which have been fluctuating pretty badly. Its not just the stress in studies, its now crept into every aspect of life. Many of my previous assumptions of myself have been challenged this year.
I guess its just God's way of reminding me how much more I still have to improve in order to really serve and obey Him.
One good thing about crisises, they almost always drive me closer to God. Which is what I must do now, focus on God, not the circumstances.
I tend to fall prey very easily to external circumstances...and my mood can be quite affected by them. And when my mood is affected, thats it. One of the most effective weapons Satan employs against me is always directed at my thought patterns. Once I hook on to a slightest negative thought, I am defenceless. Looking back, this has been a recurring trend in my spiritual walk with God.....one of the major things that keep me from walking closer with God.
The antidote? "In everything give thanks, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" 1 Thess 5:18
A very hard verse for me to obey, but with God's help I shall do it.
In the meanwhile, I just have to keep trusting God one step at a time. I guess this is real faith, because I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel, every step I take is shrouded in uncertainty. But the only thing that keeps me going is the knowledge that God will walk every dark step with me. Since He's there with me always, whats there to worry? whats there to fear?
Lord help me always, in all ways and times, give thanks.....create in me a clean, pure and joyful heart, so that I may serve You better than before......help me be contented with my circumstances in life, help me surrender my will to Yours, help me learn not to borrow from tomorrow's grace but daily walk with You......help me to ask for the lesson learnt, not the problem solved......help me humbly accept your plan for me.......help me love obey and serve thee out of agape, not self love..............strengthen me and enable me to serve Your purpose in my generation, as David did....help me love you even more. This is the extent to which my human, selfish, limited love can go.......tear out that self love and replace it with yours
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding......
Lord stay with me....every minute, every hour......I don't want to leave
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