A rather interesting convo I had with Pearlyn on her birthday thru MSN...usually i don't post such things but for reading pleasure, well...

[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
hi
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
helloo
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
is today a special day?
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
thanks ah!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAHAHA
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
i dunno le...today seems to be an important day but i cant seem to recall wad exactly
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
yah yah yah\
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
ladaladalada
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAHAHAHA
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
thanks la thanks
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAHA
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
recalled alrdy?
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
oh ya i rmb
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
you purposely trying to irritate me right
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
huh huh huh
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
you wanna fight ah
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAHAHA
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
it's someones birthday!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
JEREMY SU
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
I REMEMBER I REMEMBER!
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
today is Gwyneth Paltrow's 36th birthday!
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
its also Li Yapeng's 37th birthday!
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
yes yes now i remember
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
i got to sms gwyneth paltrow and wish her happy birthday
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
JEREMY SU CHANG XIONG
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
wonder how's her baby daughter i havent seen her in so long
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
JEREMY SMELLY SU CHANG XIONG
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
!
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
its also Andy Lau's 47th birthday!
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
I haven contacted him since he autographed my poster
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
I'm sure you have his number?
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
my my i have so many frens birthday today
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
we kinda lost contact
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
wow would you like to help me ask for edison chens number?
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
oh so sad
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
JEREMY SU!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
PURPOSELY RIGHT
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
i dun want his number....
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
i wanted his number to scold him btw
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
YOU!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
PURPOSELY!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
I TELL YOU!
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
oh its also Avril Lavigne's 24th birthday!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
I'm ignoring you
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
my my shes going to hold her concert here did you know
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAHAHA
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
im soooooo excited!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
so you think you phoenix you cool la!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
purposely la!
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
why u jealous that i know so many famous ppl is it?
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
oh pleease
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
dream dream
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
haha
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
wait ari need to go congratulate all my frens whose bday is today
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
i seem to have forgotten someone though....
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
i am not talking to you]\
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAH
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
of course you're not; you're TYPING to me
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
OH MY GOSH
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
okay I'm not typing to you anymore
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX]..says:
btw, my name is xiong chang, not chang xiong, and i smell really nice
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
oh yea JEREMY SU CHEST LONG HAHAHAHA
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
thhanks im proud of my chest too
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
aiya got to go
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
it was nice irritating you.....hope i can do that more often
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
OMG
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
just go jump down now
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
srwsly
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
haha
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
surely you can't bear to see me die?
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
uhm cause I believe that you can fly
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
so yea
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
go jump down
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
how heartless of u
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
dun talk to u. i gtg
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
no i heartmore
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
not less
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
and happy 17th birthday
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
finally but yea
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
THANKS LA
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
(:
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
God bless
[xXiv]..[PhOeNiX].. says:
bye
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
bye!
Pearlyn, ♥ says:
goodnight!

Haha...happy 17th birthday Pearlyn Pua...don't get too mad when you read this, if you want we can have another round:)

Really got no time to blog....and anyway few ppl read it, so I don't blog often....

Last Sunday was rather interesting though, we had a kind of Chraiskidz teacher appreciation performance.....organised by Jaime and the parents...heres what happened.

Jaime looked me up on Saturday the day before and asked me to come for service the next day. Naturally I asked why. She wouldn't tell me, so I just came on Sunday lor.

Actually I already had an idea it was something to do with teacher's day, because it was just over, so anyway I came on Sunday early to study with Evonne and Claire(but she overslept).

Rather irrelevant/silly things happened next so I shall just fast forward to the performance. We (evonne and me) went in for communion at 0930hrs then waited for service to end. Then came the performance.

Apparently the kids and the parents had put up a song item for us and Jaime even printed personalised notebooks with our names on them and with the thank you notes from all our kids for each teacher......it was really a lot of effort and really must thank Jaime as well as the parents for all the covert practices/rehearsals, and all the effort put in to thank us teachers...

At the end of the song performance somebody(I forgot who) announced that they would be thanking the teachers for all their efforts and contribution, and then she started to call us up one by one by name to recieve our "tokens of appreciation".

Then we were thinking it was kinda embarassing to just go up one by one but we had no choice haha....was a bit mahlu but also good la....all of us were there except teachers Joel(he had CCA), Claire and Niu(overslept). Afterwards we enjoyed a video made for Jaime personally by the parents....and they also bought for her this HUGE bouquet of flowers....and could see that she was quite touched.

The parents also prepared a sumptious luncheon for us....highlights include shredded chicken and mayo and onion crackers (voted most popular, I ate at least 15), mango cream swiss rolls (I ate 6), sweet curry with the usual stuff, longan and almond dessert, and nuggets. Exquisite.

Thanks to GOD for calling all of us to serve Him in Chariskidz...over the last few years my spiritual life has been enriched by sharing it with all you teachers....as well as guiding the kids. Thanks to all the parents and kids and JAIME for organising all that......it was really really good.

Anyway I took a good break from mugging that day and really enjoyed myself....it felt kind of ethereal and dreamy sensation, a very peaceful, happy day....strange what a simple celebration can do.

We ended at around 1130 and I didn't feel like sticking around so homed with Linette and Evonne. Droppeed L off at MRT then took the 76 bus back with E. Had a rather relaxing time listening to the radio on her MP3....then reached home at around 1pm.

Fast forward 5 days to today. Prelims are almost over and tomorrow is Zhong Qiu Jie celebrations haha time to relax again. Been sleeping only 5 hours a day because of the tremendous volume of knowledge I have to cram into my cranium.

Only wished that day could have lasted a little longer

Hies...its a long long time since I blogged.

Updates on my status: Prelims are in 5 days, A levels are in 2 months and for the first time im seriously looking at the possibility of not getting my straight A's

Its not that I'm arrogant, its just...well...I am an extreme perfectionist. My friends can vouch for that.

Aside from all that, my recent weeks have been drowned in a storm of negative thoughts and feelings which have been fluctuating pretty badly. Its not just the stress in studies, its now crept into every aspect of life. Many of my previous assumptions of myself have been challenged this year.

I guess its just God's way of reminding me how much more I still have to improve in order to really serve and obey Him.

One good thing about crisises, they almost always drive me closer to God. Which is what I must do now, focus on God, not the circumstances.

I tend to fall prey very easily to external circumstances...and my mood can be quite affected by them. And when my mood is affected, thats it. One of the most effective weapons Satan employs against me is always directed at my thought patterns. Once I hook on to a slightest negative thought, I am defenceless. Looking back, this has been a recurring trend in my spiritual walk with God.....one of the major things that keep me from walking closer with God.

The antidote? "In everything give thanks, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus" 1 Thess 5:18

A very hard verse for me to obey, but with God's help I shall do it.

In the meanwhile, I just have to keep trusting God one step at a time. I guess this is real faith, because I cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel, every step I take is shrouded in uncertainty. But the only thing that keeps me going is the knowledge that God will walk every dark step with me. Since He's there with me always, whats there to worry? whats there to fear?

Lord help me always, in all ways and times, give thanks.....create in me a clean, pure and joyful heart, so that I may serve You better than before......help me be contented with my circumstances in life, help me surrender my will to Yours, help me learn not to borrow from tomorrow's grace but daily walk with You......help me to ask for the lesson learnt, not the problem solved......help me humbly accept your plan for me.......help me love obey and serve thee out of agape, not self love..............strengthen me and enable me to serve Your purpose in my generation, as David did....help me love you even more. This is the extent to which my human, selfish, limited love can go.......tear out that self love and replace it with yours

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding......

Lord stay with me....every minute, every hour......I don't want to leave